i had a performance last night. 2 people rolled with me. camera on deck. none of my crew was there, though.
so, the reason why i even came to this bar place to perform is because the promoter dude personally called me on my cell and was like " yo, Turbo, we were feeling your last performance and a couple of people here were just wondering if you could come here again and who knows, we do this event regularly so you can use it as a place to practice or whatever you know?"
I was with it. like an idiot, I was with it.
So I was like "really? that's wussup, i'll see what I can do..."
the next night ( last night ) I went out there with the 2 homies and camera and what not...we were understandably under the impression that I was going to perform. I had a cd with instrumentals on it and everything.
I get there, dude is all like Hey wussup, glad that you could make it. We are doing like a little advertising thing for the event and I need you to record like a little promotion thing and hold up this sign and tell people where they can check you out at" ...etc. etc.
I was with it. like an iiiiidiot, I was with it.
I go outside where there's this bright light and the camera man (he had a pretty nice camera though) and the promoter. Excuse me if my grammar and what not is horrible when I'm typing stuff like this because I know that I won't be getting graded on this. If there are other english majors out there or even anyone who has the pet peeve of horrible grammar and stuff....forgive me.
ok, back to the story.
I do the thing like "yo what up this turbo t. double here at the blu monkey lounge - be sure you come out to support this event called "i got bars' - it's really cool, a good opportunity. i was here last time and it was cool and blah blah blah ' - just saying good stuff...like an idiot. mind you, the whole time, this photographer was taking pictures during the interview... i don't know if ya'll know how I feel about pictures but....yeah. I DON'T exactly like them that much... this is the start of the rapid downwards spiral.
after that...i go back inside the club with my two boys...chilled for a bit..twittered "at the performance place"....and then I thought...'hey, don't they need my instrumentals if the performances are gonna start here pretty soon"
I then go up to the dude...and that's when he is like " man to keep it 100 with you, i got alotta cats coming out here for the first time and it wouldn't be fair if they dont get to perform so to keep it 100 with you, you might not perform tonight and if you do, it's gonna be laaaaate in the night".....
how would that make you feel? what would you have done?
Does this dude know that I have 2 ppl taking time out of their life to come see me perform? That gas money was used because we don't stay up the street from Hollywood Blvd?
I attempted to get the promotion footage that was recorded - deleted... that didn't work, that's wussup.
then i was like, autobots, let's roll out.
and we bounced.
and wen't to the Saddle Ranch in Hollywood.
Met some dudes from Australia who wanted to buy BB guns....and wanted to know where Inglewood was at and if they would be ok with what they were wearing. ( color wise) They said that it was illegal for them to own paintball guns over there and that they don't have a football team. Then we talked about guitar amps and about Vegas since they were going there for the New Years. They were funny and pretty cool. I gave one of them a Youtube/Scrambletv card.
then we drove around the rich houses in beverly hills and bel-air.
but the main point of this blog entry is just to say that I have an invisible LIST. A list in which I think everyone has. I believe Jay-Z said on his song "So Ambitious" concerning his uncle or someone who wasn't feeling his music that That person was "on the list".
that promoter, the camera man, the photographer, and even the rappers that were there, are on my list. an invisible potential 'i told you so' list. Along with everyone who has called me a 'nobody' and everyone who has doubted anything in which I have set out to do. I really want to be able to go where people appreciate my music.
I wan't to go to different states and countries. It's just very frustrating... especially when SIGNED artist know about you and your situation, when promoters are scandalous, and when you lack the appropriate 'networking' skills within, I guess, the 'hip hop community'.
Most, if not all, of my connects are in the Movie industry, the Gaming industry, and the Education industry...and as of right now this whole dream of Hip Hop in the PHYSICAL REALM is not looking very logical. It's alot to think about but seriously, I think it is the fact that you, the reader, are down with the [insert another word for 'movement'...I don't wanna say movement] that makes me continue to make 'something out of nothing' [Ozone video]
Dropping music completely and focusing all energy on my film career could result in being more productive - however - I know that that would be impossible because of my major passion in music and having to live with the fact that all of the nay-sayers were right and that I am indeed a sucker and a quitter.
Can't go out like that.
times like this, I guess, are tests or something? idk. But this is [insert a phrase that says 'more than music' or something like that, i don't wanna say 'more than music' ] and I do it for the hood?
and for Dz, Saylen, Armor, Slash MF Merritt, friends, family, honest hearted connects, superb supporters, the 20 iTunes purchasers, positive Youtube commenters, fellow talented rappers, and Busta and Long Long...and etc. etc.
there will most likely be more vents. it helps.
all in all, like a broken record, Scramble UP.